Fuck Swearing

Swearing is used in our language an awful lot, especially by teenagers or young adults. The act of swearing is used to add some needed emphasis, or just for fun. Swearing is usually used with discretion, depending on who your company is at the time. With a group of like-minded friends you may use it without thought, but would probably tone it down a bit when you’re in a more formal setting, for the sake of not looking like a total imbecile. Everyone swears at some point, we all do. I do, you do, your mum does. Swearing is sometimes used excellently, to convey some poignancy in speech, or just for some comedic value, especially when said frequently. Swearing has some really great uses, but there are some people who use it in a way which I find overwhelmingly frustrating.

When someone starts to use it as either every other word, or far too frequently, it definitely gives me the wrong impression, or the correct impression if it’s actually what they’re like. Use it sparingly, or only when needed, or even, use it frequently, but just in really great or thoughtful ways. When I’m having a conversation and I hear “And then he fucking went and fucking made sure he fucking had to fucking-” you get the idea. It’s annoying to hear, it prevents me from hearing the story quicker and it doesn’t add anything. It just makes me annoyed and you look like a moron, fuck off.

Obviously there has been tests, extensive tests, on whether swearing means you’re stupid or intelligent, and the result was intelligent. It does mean you’re smarter, but your use of it really does make me question whether you’re smart or not. Especially depending on the quantity of swears, as I’ve said. Please vary your punctuation. There are some stellar adjectives and verbs you could be using in replacement, which often add better emphasis to your point than a ‘fuck’ would, especially when they’re used ironically. Like ‘brilliant’ or ‘excellent’. I usually find it quite difficult to say those words in speech without sounding extremely sarcastic or disingenuous. Have a play around, swears lose their impact after too many uses, also, it gets really dull.

I know it sounds like I’m your mum, saying that ‘swearing is just a sign of limited vocabulary’, which is not what I’m trying to say. I swear a lot of the time, but never an abundance at once. Swear when you want, but please just hold back a little bit. It gets boring. I think swearing can often add some excellence to a piece of writing, or speech. Punchlines often rely on swearing, and delivery of the swears can often be a joke themselves. Swearing proves to be quite a fun and intriguing part of the English language, but just gets misused and a bad reputation for a minority of idiots that use it. I might be going on a bit, and getting a bit too repetitive about it now, though. After all, they’re just words.

Reuben Morris